Welcome to a new series of posts about relationships! Siblings, Boys, Girls, Teachers, Friends, and Parents, ect. I’ll try to cover them as best I can.
Parents… They can be teen’s best friend or (it may seem) worst enemy. But what we forget is that they really are on our side. Now, there are exceptions, but from what I’ve heard about from many you and your parents, you have a family with a mom and a dad who are strong Christians.
Personally, I have a good relationship with my parents. They trust me, and I generally have a lot of freedom. We have our arguments here are there, but I seriously think I had my teenage years from years 7-11. I was a major brat, if you can believe it. It’s so amazing how much our relationship has improved.
Our relationship improved mainly because I realized that:
1. My parents want the best for me
2. They have been assigned to be over me by God
3. They sacrifice a LOT
4. They are their own person. Who am I to try to control them?
Elaborating 1: Ever think of something you really wanted to do, but never got to do it? For me it’s ice skating, horse riding at an early age, learning the drums or guitar, ect.
Ever catch yourself saying, “Dude, when I grow up, my kids are so gonna (fill in the blank)!”
Well, that’s what a lot of parents think. My parents didn’t get into music, but really wanted to. Therefore, my sister and I are very art-based. She does clay and piano. I do some violin and piano. We both love drawing.
Thanks to my parents, who postponed (by three years, I believe) buying a new car to get us a grand piano and paid big bucks to get us violins. They are Artista’s biggest fans sculpture-wise, and are totally honest with her to make her the best.
My parents rock, and I hope this post opens you eyes to see that your parents do too! I’m sure many of you have similar situations like mine.
Rules can be icky at times. But I’ve realized (not through experience) that teens can get dangerous without boundaries.
Can you list some instances where your parents have worked to get you to your best potential?
Elaborating 2: Of course my parents are my authority, but I see them more as allies now. Friends. Awesome, godly people who I admire and look up to. I don’t always get them, I don’t always like what they say, but when I look at what they have done for me, I have to obey. Yes, it’s hard. My advice? Pray about it! Can you remember what they’ve done for you when you forget point two?
Elaborating 3: This is sort of an extension of point one. How many of your parents have sacrificed their time/ money/ effort for you? My dad rocks. He helps me out in math when I don’t get what the teacher taught. He sacrifices relaxing time to help out his thick-skulled daughter get numbers into her head. He goes out of his way to take me when I go horse riding. It was hard getting them to agree due to my wild ride a little more than a year ago, but my parents loved me enough to give me one of my many dreams. My mother cooks, she cleans the house, and she gives me advice on how my clothes look or how I can improve in my work. She really sacrifices herself so her daughters can have the best future possible.
What about your parents? Can you list some thing they do for you?
Elaborating 4: Ah, ‘tis the biggie, no? Teens can get SO embarrassed when it comes to parents acting- shall I dare say it- “uncool”. This is the one I struggled with the most when I was 7-11.
Ever say/scream these things?
“Dad, don’t you dare!’
“You’re embarrassing me!”
Don’t try to control your parents. Remember, you’re the kid. Your parents are individuals, they are not you. If your people think you’re weird because of your parents? You probably shouldn’t be hanging with them.
Parents are the best friends because they are completely honest. They will tell you if you look dorky, your project isn’t as good as it could be, the people you hang out with shouldn’t be your friends, ect. We really should learn to appreciate them more.
Now this might be a miscellaneous topic, but it’s sort of relevant. I’ve noticed that a lot of people call their parents by their first name.
It just seems so flippant, so disrespectful! What’s wrong with “Mom” and “Dad”? Even “Mommy” or “Daddy”. I call my dad “Daddy”, and that comes a lot from the fact that I’ve been doing it from when I could first talk and it’s somewhat of an Indian thing. I believe that calling your parents by their titles is the way to go. Any of ya’ll have any ideas?
Several of my close friends have parents that left them/ died/ divorced. Don’t think it’s your fault. You won’t believe how many teens have ruined themselves thinking that their parents’ problems are their problems, or that they are the cause for everything bad in their parents’ relationships. Never think that. God does things for purposes. Perhaps we don’t understand them, but God is God. Perhaps we will be stronger, or will be able to reach out.
You may have just a mom or just a dad. Do your best to uphold your parents, but remember, they are the parents. Your job is being the child. Your job is to honor your parents and obey them whether you want to or not.
Now the question is what if my parents aren’t Christian?
Wow, I don’t know how that feels, but I have friends who are going through that. My advice? Be a testimony. Your parent(s) should see that you are a new creation, a new person, a child of God. Yes, you should honor them at all times. Obeying? Yes, the same rules apply, but remember, God is first in your life. If whatever your parent says contradicts Scripture, you are not obligated to obey them. But be sure! Your parents are the authority God has put over you. It does not contradict Scripture to clean your room, go pick up something, take out the trash, ect. The Holy Spirit will let you know if something isn’t right.
Are you adopted?
Your adopted parents ARE your parents. Your siblings ARE your family. Never doubt that you are of no worth. God placed you into a family. Your family chose you. Your family loves you. Never EVER doubt that.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve gotta go give my mom a hug.
P.S. Thank you SO much for all of the comments! You rock!